Welcome to
another week and with Valentines Day looming, love is all around. Or is it?
Whilst next
week, we’ll share some great last minute ideas for Valentines Day treats and
escapes, this week we thought we would look at some of the signs that point to
an office romance in the making!
Birds
Do It, Bees Do It, Even Employees Do It
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You'd think people have
enough to do when they are at work, but obviously they don't, as they spend
huge amounts of time gossiping about each other. And nothing is juicier than
other people's love lives, especially when it's supposed to be a secret.
The latest rumour making
the rounds at your company is that Arthur in marketing and Martha the office
manager are "seeing each other" outside the usual channels if you
catch our drift. But how can you really know for sure, aside from hacking into
their email?
There's no need to do
anything as unethical as that -- just watch for these 15 tell-tale signs that
an office love affair is brewing.
1.
They Avoid Eye Contact
When Arthur was hired
and met Martha on the job there was a bit of competition between them, which
led to tension in the office. And so you were happy to see them gradually
become cordial, then friends, and finally close friends. Soon it was clear they
had really clicked as colleagues.
Everything seemed to be
going swimmingly, and then, suddenly, they became extremely formal with each
other. Now they barely make eye contact in public anymore. And when you do
encounter them in a room together, Martha blushes, Arthur looks pale, and they
both suddenly leave.
2.
They Never Leave the Office Together
"OK, I'm out of
here," Martha announces loudly, making sure everyone in the office can
hear. "I'm heading home to feed my cats, wash my hair, and watch 'Britain's
Got Talent.'"
"I think I'll stay
and do a little more work on the Farber contract and prepare for the planning
meeting," Arthur answers just as loudly. "See you tomorrow."
You've got a pretty
small office, and most employees leave work around the same time. But lately,
for some odd reason, Arthur and Martha make a point of letting everyone know
they are leaving separately.
3.
They're Both Putting in an Awful Lot of
Overtime
You don't even think
about it any more. When someone is needed to pull a little overtime, you know Arthur
and Martha will be the first to volunteer.
They've always been good
employees, but they used to have lives outside of work. Now (when they aren't
ostentatiously making sure everyone knows they are leaving separately) they are
both the first into work in the morning and the last to leave; in fact, you
have no idea when they leave, because you do
have a life outside the office and you go home.
4. You
Feel Like You're Invading a Private Party
Why is it you always
seem to be invading a private party when you run into these two?
You need some staples.
You walk into the supply room, and Arthur and Martha happen to be there. Martha
is furiously brushing her hair and Arthur won't even turn around to face you.
He seems fascinated with looking through the file folders against the back
wall.
Lately Martha and Arthur
seem to be reading the same books, watching the same movies, and have an
endless string of insider jokes to which only they are privy. And then there
are all those meaningful, knowing glances in the lunch room, by the water
cooler -- pretty much everywhere, which is honestly a bit annoying.
5.
They Keep Coincidently Showing Up in the Same Places
The first time you
encountered Arthur in Martha's office you thought nothing of it. But after a
while you came to realize that if you wanted to find one, all you had to do was
find the other. If they are both missing, you check the mail room. You won't be
surprised to find them in the broom closet one of these days.
Then there are the occasional
wardrobe malfunctions: You could have sworn Martha's blouse was buttoned
correctly when she arrived this morning, and ... is Arthur wearing his sweater
inside-out? But you really began to suspect something was up when you saw them
together at the restaurant across town -- on a Saturday. They said they were
"having a strategy meeting." Now that's
dedication
6.
They Start Fiercely Defending Each Other
Your company is known
for creative, outside-the-box brainstorming sessions, no hard feelings and no
holds barred. Employees enjoy the freedom to engage in lively debate and witty
repartee. They are confident and skilled, and everyone knows it's nothing
personal if an idea doesn't float.
At the last planning
meeting, Martha made a suggestion that was immediately shot down by others.
Nothing unusual there; this happens all the time, to everyone. But when Arthur
adamantly defended her position beyond any logic, and then challenged Ron from
Sales to "take it outside" it was, well, a little weird.
7.
Their Vacation and Sick Days Keep Matching Up
The first time Arthur
and Martha took vacation days at the same time you thought it was just a
coincidence. By the third time, you were seeing a trend. And when they began
calling in sick on the same days, you weren't the only one talking about it. In
fact, it has become more surprising to see one of them in the office on a day
when the other is out.
Ask either one of them
what they did on their time off and you get a vague answer. And neither Arthur
nor Martha ever offers to show you vacation photos anymore.
8.
Their Tastes Have Changed
Arthur's been known to
drive for miles to catch an Alan Jackson show. Martha loves going to the
symphony. Suddenly, Arthur is urging you to listen to the first movement of
Brahms's Piano and Cello Sonata, Opus 99. "Isn't that exquisite?" he
says with a strange fervour in his eyes as you back out of the room slowly.
And what about that Alan
Jackson bobble head on Martha's desk? "I think his music's fun!" she
insists, laughing manically. There are other signs: Martha, never a sports fan,
suddenly cares about the football team of the college that (coincidently) Arthur
attended; and the other day Arthur expressed strong opinions at the water
cooler about the latest Jennifer Aniston movie.
9.
They Both Look Great
Martha was always
pretty, but there used to be days when it looked like she'd forgotten to iron
her blouse or comb her hair. Now her makeup is always perfect, she's sporting a
sleek hairdo, and she wears stylish new outfits.
Arthur was a
good-looking guy, but couch-potato weekends were starting to show around his
middle. Then he started jogging at lunchtime, and instead of eating his usual
deli sandwich and chips he was suddenly frequenting the salad bar. "Gotta
stay in shape," he says, patting his shrinking belly. Then Martha started
jogging too, and they both joined the same local fitness centre.
10.
Their Office Doors Are Always Closed
Arthur always struck you
as one of those "open office door" kind of guys. His assistant seemed
to run in and out of there constantly, bringing him files, documents to sign,
and the occasional cafe latte. Nowadays, however, the files and documents get
slid under the door and Arthur seems to have cut back on the caffeine.
Arthur's office door is
always closed. In fact, according to those who have tried to barge in on him,
not just closed but locked.
Arthur must be in closed-door meetings a lot, but the only person he ever seems
to be in closed-door meetings with is Martha. And you can't imagine the subject
of those meeting can be that confidential and serious when all you seem to hear
in there is the rustle of papers, furniture creaking, and an occasional giggle.
11.
You Notice Strange Goings-On in the Parking Garage
You usually just eat
lunch at your desk but last Thursday you had an errand to run across town, and
lunchtime was the only time to do it. While walking through the parking garage
to your car, you noticed Martha's silver Dodge
What's weird is that the
windows of the car were all steamed up. And the reason that was weird was
because it was a sunny June day.
12.
They Both Tend to Disappear at the Same Time
That outdoor corporate
bonding event was a great idea. Everyone seemed have a lot of fun spending the
day in the park, falling back into each other's arm during the
"Trust" game and running while tied together for the "3-Legged
Race." It was such a blast.
Only it's too bad that
two of your employees didn't feel well that day. Those two employees just
happened to be Arthur and Martha. "I think I ate too many corn dogs,"
Arthur moaned, holding his stomach. "I must have gotten too much
sun," whispered Martha, looking like she might faint. So everyone left
them behind on a blanket near the edge of the woods and didn't really think
about them again.
Funny how they both came
in on Monday with the same bad case of poison ivy.
13.
They Seem to Drive to Work Together
You consider yourself to
be very environmentally conscious. That's why you bought that Prius, isn't it?
So you think it's great that some of your employees have started to carpool to
work together. At least, that's what you thought when you drove by Martha's car
and saw her pull over to let Arthur out about a block away from the office.
It was strange that
Martha wouldn't just drop Arthur off in front of the office (it was raining,
after all). But that wasn't as strange as the fact that two people who live on
opposite sides of town decided to start carpooling to work. Martha must be waking
up very early to get all the way over to Arthur's house each morning.
14.
They Don't Actually Seem to Get Any Work Done
Arthur and Martha have
both started to make Ron in customer service, up until now your least
productive employee, look like a Type-A go-getter by comparison.
That PowerPoint
presentation you've been waiting for Arthur to send you? It's over a week late
and it doesn't look like it will be finished any time soon. And your office
supply cabinet is as bare as Mother Hubbard's cupboard. What exactly is your
office manager doing these days?
15.
You Get an Invitation to the Wedding
The invitation is classy
and elegant. It's printed on thick, creamy paper and requests the pleasure of
your company at Arthur and Martha's wedding. You find you're not all that
surprised. Suddenly those meaningful glances, those private jokes, those clumsy
efforts they made to pretend nothing was going on, the odd forays to the supply
room, Martha's newfound interest in football, and the coincidental days off --
it all makes sense.
Of course you accept the
invitation. Weddings are fun, you like these two crazy kids, and who knows?
Maybe you'll
meet someone interesting at their reception.
In other news
this week, we’re off to the Independent Venue Showcase tonight at Champneys
Springs in Ashby de la Zouch with our friends from the CHS
Group.
In a tranquil setting in
Leicestershire, surrounded by water walkways and beautiful open parklands,
Champneys is a cocoon of calm that grows around you, melting away your stress
and leaving you feeling fabulous.
Springs spa hotel is
home to the finest Champneys traditions of health, fitness and wellbeing, as
well as a full size FIFA football pitch, all delivered
with a touch of luxury in the heart of the Midlands .
We might just
see you there!
Have a great
week, enjoy!
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